SCRIPTURES
I Sam. 1:16 - Hannah's bitter provocation
(childlessness).
I Sam. 2:33 - Grief
over children.
Psalm 6:7 - Eyes
consumed because of grief.
Psalm 31:9 - Eyes,
inner self & body weakened from grief.
Psalm 31:10 - Life
spent with grief.
Psalm 78:40 - God's
grief over our rebellion.
Prov. 17:25 -
Foolish son is grief to father.
Is. 17:11 - Griefs
due to worshipping Adonis.
Is. 53:3 - Jesus
acquainted with grief.
Is. 53:4 & 10 -
Jesus bore our griefs.
Jer. 6:7 -
Jeremiah's grief over Jerusalem's wickedness.
Jer. 45:3 - Lord
added grief to sorrow.
II Cor. 2:5 - Grief
caused by incest.
Eph. 4:30 - Grieve
not the Holy Spirit.
II Cor. 1:3 - God
comforts and consoles us in all our troubles.
II Cor. 1:4 - So
that we may comfort others in their trouble.
I Pet. 5:6- -
Knowing the same sufferings are appointed to your
brethren in
11 - the world. God
will complete, settle, secure and establish you.
GENERAL
I learned about grief when our son died. In
time this grief became dear to me. I was very heart
broken when I hadn't thought of him all day.
God met us at the
time of Byron's death. He did unusual things to get
our attention and to minister to us. This saved our
lives but did not remove grief from us. We followed
the usual pattern for those who grieve. We used grief
and self-pity to manipulate others and disobey God. No
one of us was aware of these actions at the time, yet
we became expert at using them. Our demons having
become expert at using people for thousands of years,
have us doing their bidding very well, very quickly.
FAMILY
REACTIONS
As we were unable to meet Marie's needs, she
felt rejected and went into rebellion and bitterness.
She would rebel just for the sake of rebelling. She
didn't know it at the time, neither did we, but these
actions were the result of distrust because we let her
brother die. Parents are to protect children. The
demons told her this but she was not conscious of
agreeing with them. Clever aren't they?
Gene withdrew from
the family, and neglected family problems and needs to
minister to others.
I grieved over all
the above. I became dominating, a Jezebel, trying to
fix everything for everybody except myself. This
dominating tended to emphasize everyone's troubles,
even creating more troubles.
GENE'S
TESTIMONY
After Byron's death, the world seemed unreal.
I wanted to leave this world and I asked God to kill
us. This was an improper prayer and it was a selfish
action on my part. Losing Byron was like losing an arm
or a leg. We searched the Bible to see if we could
commit suicide, go to heaven and be with Byron, and
also to be out of our misery. The Bible says that you
have no right to commit suicide and you may end up in
Hell. We prayed that the plane would crash in the
Atlanta Airport. There were one-hundred tornadoes in
Atlanta that day and the plane shook on its take-off.
My grief really was for my loss and for myself. God
told us that Byron was in Heaven. I would sit and hold
Byron's picture and cry; I did this many times. I felt
like I had to grieve over Byron's death or I was not
showing proper love for him. I would drive to work
praying and crying. I cry often now but they are tears
of joy. I have found that there is nothing wrong with
a man crying in the sight of God.
I did not want to
work but God told me that I must support my family. I
tried to go to the mission field but nobody wanted me;
they only wanted me to go to the seminary. God told me
to continue to be an engineer and to start helping
others who were in need.
After Byron's death
we really started seeking God. Jesus was our Savior
but He became our Lord and Master also.
Byron's death caused
us to reach out and help others who were experiencing
death in their families. God has helped restore our
lives as we have helped others. Now we have a ministry
of helping others centered around deliverance.
It took four years
to write our testimony "From Death Into Real Life" and
to overcome our grief. I handled my grief by the
following steps: I quit looking back at Byron's death,
I ministered to the needs of my family, and I went on
with what the Lord wanted me to do.
EARLINE'S
TESTIMONY
I grieved over Byron's death and worried over
my family. I became a dominating Jezebel, trying to
fix everything for everyone except myself. This action
tended to make everything worse, even creating more
problems. I prayed and fasted a lot to get God to
straighten them out, but forgot to ask for wisdom and
understanding to straighten myself out. I did not
follow I Peter 5:7-11. I would cast my cares upon Him
but because there was no quick-fix, I took them all
back and did not follow on to believe v.9, that after
a while He would finish the work He planned in us. We
would be established, secure, settled and strengthened
I had been taught about good confessions. I confessed,
until I was worn out, that the problems would be taken
care of by God. Things got worse rather than better. I
did not take scriptural care of my part of the
problem. I was ignorant of the Bible's instruction so
God could not act. I did not qualify due to ignorance
and disobedience (Hosea 4:6). I began to say to God,
"If I must go through this, please teach me all that I
need to learn. I don't want to go through this over
and over."
Grief is a normal
reaction to loss or pain . It is not normal grief when
two, five or ten years later, it is as great or
greater then when it happened. Grief becomes rebellion
when it controls our action to the point we do not
obey God.
In John 10:10 we
find out who wants to kill, steal and destroy us. The
Devil never lets up when you have trouble; that's when
he pounces the hardest through his demons.
DEFINITIONS
What is grief? Grief is sorrow, heavy,
grievous, sad; intense suffering caused by emotions
due to loss, misfortune, injury, evil, regret or
suffering; to be morbid, to suffer calamity, failure,
distress or lament.
Emotions
Grief causes a breakdown in emotional control.
Emotions will fluctuate wildly.
Will
You are unable to do what you see you should
do or need to do.
Body
Doctors tell us, after many years of study,
those who are bitter, in grief or unforgiving create a
climate in the body where cancer, arthritis and ulcers
thrive. Our body chemistry and functions are out of
order due to the stress created by grief, bitterness
and unforgiveness.
Mind
The mind should be under control by the
person's spirit which should be under the direction of
the Holy Spirit. We tend to think of our mind as the
supreme part of us but it is not. We are a spirit that
has a soul and lives in a body.
INSTRUCTIONS
Just as we do not let our hands or feet do
their own thing, neither do we let our mind accept
every thought coming into it. A mind can receive more
than one thought at a time from more than one source.
We hear from God and Satan at the same time. We should
examine every thought that comes into our minds. If it
does not pass a Biblical inspection, we should reject
it. If it lines up with the Bible, we pray for wisdom
and act on the wisdom God gives. Many thoughts coming
through our minds are not our own but are sent out by
evil spirits to snag us. If we accept them and think
back with them, we can be led into depression , sins,
etc.
Many thoughts coming
into your mind are not your own but are sent to entice
you. If we accept them and act on them, we can be led
into sins in mind or body.
Boys at Louisiana
Training Institute would tell me that they had
thoughts to do the crime and not to do it at the same
time. They did not sort out the good from the evil and
made the wrong choice. Rom. 6:16-17 tells us that to
whomever we yield ourselves servants to obey, that's
whose slave we become; if to unrighteousness - death
and if to righteousness - life in God.
John 10:10 says
Jesus comes to give life abundantly. My cry was "Lord
how do I get life abundantly?" I learned a new song
(Is. 60:1), "Arise, shine for your light has come." I
tried but I didn't know how to arise or shine. In the
Amplified Bible I found the complete directions.
Is. 60:1 - Arise
(from the depression and prostration in which
circumstances have kept you; rise to a new life).
Shine (be radiant with the glory of the Lord; for your
light has come, and the glory of the Lord has risen
upon you).
Now I knew what I
was to arise from - depression and prostration. Each
time I tried to arise, a ton of weight held me down.
Is. 61:1-4: Jesus
came to preach the gospel, bind and heal the broken
hearted, proclaim liberty to the physical and
spiritual captives, and opening of the prisons and
eyes of the blind. To proclaim the year of favor, to
grant consolation and joy to those that mourn, to give
beauty for ashes, praise for failing spirit and build
oaks of righteousness that the Lord be glorified.
Grief does not bring
glory to the Lord but joy, praise and righteousness
do. Verse 4 says after all this is done, they (the
people) will rebuild their ruined lives and cities.
This has begun to come true in the lives of our family
members.
I realized I was
asking God to fix the circumstances around me that I
should have been at work on. I was continually asking
how? Right off I saw more scripture after I saw the
scripture about forgiveness.
Mark 11:22-26 and
Matt. 18:21-35 instructed me to forgive everyone who
had ever wronged me in anyway, including myself. I
must forgive Byron for dying and myself for thinking I
could have prevented it, and ask God to forgive me for
blaming Him.
Forgiveness doesn't
mean forgetting. It means let it drop, leave it and
let it go (Matt.6:6-15). Count the offense unimportant
compared to what Jesus did for me, (Matt. 18:34-35).
As I came to forgive, much of the ton of weight fell
off of me. I must forgive to be forgiven. If I regard
iniquity in my heart, God will not hear me.
Unforgiveness is sin (Ps. 66:18). Many of my prayers
were not answered because of unforgiveness, grief or
bitterness.
We grieve over many
things: our sins, the results of our sins, rejections,
worries, neglect, divorce, abuse, death, failure,
children's failures, etc.
A spirit of grief is
bitter. This bitterness reaches everybody and
everything around us (Heb. 12:14-16).
Our grief kept us so
tied up in it that we neglected each other and our
daughter. She took the neglect to mean rejection and
she began to reject herself; after rejection, entered
rebellion.
HOW DID WE
GET OUT OF THIS MESS?
After two years of fasting, Bible study and
prayer, God suggested that I ask Gene to pray
deliverance for me. We had never heard of prayers for
deliverance; neither did we know what it was or how to
do it. Gene suggested we go into our room and ask God
to help us. The Bible says we have the Holy Spirit; we
don't need anyone to teach us (I John 2:27).
After a very lengthy
prayer, Gene began to call out things bothering me.
The basis for deliverance is Mark 16:16-20 and Jesus'
examples in the Gospels.
As he called out
unforgiveness, the faces of people and circumstances
flashed before me, and I forgave them. He then
proceeded to rejection, bitterness (of which grief is
a part) and rebellion.
WHAT TO DO
IF YOU ARE CAUGHT IN THE GRIP OF GRIEF AND
BITTERNESS Forgiveness (Mark 11:25) -
Christians have no choice but to forgive. Matt.
18:34-35: God will send tormentors on you if you don't
forgive.
Submit To God (John
4:23-24) - Face up to the facts; do not use grief as
an excuse to disobey God, for bad behavior or to
neglect duties. Fantasy is deadly. Obey - To establish
basis for deliverance, you must obey appropriate
scriptures. Honesty -If you love me, you will keep my
commandments. God hates lies and lying. Bind up the
evil forces working against you. Loose yourself from
them and ask God to send his forces to aid in your
release: wisdom, discerning of spirits, power and
might (seven-fold Spirit of God). Call Out All Evil
Spirits From Yourself And Other Family Members
To Stay Free After
Deliverance - Control your thought life (II Cor.
10:5). I got very holy asking God to control my
thoughts. After weeks of doing this, I heard "Stupid!
What is the understood subject of that sentence?" I
had my answer; I was to bring every thought into
subjection to Jesus Christ. He quoted Isa. 55 to me.
Phil. 4:8 gives a list of things you should think on -
things worthy of reverence, just, honorable, seemly,
pure, lovely, lovable, kind, winsome, gracious; if
there be any virtue, excellence or anything worthy of
praise, think on, weigh, and take account of these
things. Fix your mind on them. This is a commandment!
Resist Satan - I never in my wildest imagination could
have known how Satan would fight against my desire to
obey. I got a lot of experience in forgiving and in
thought control right off. People began to say and do
things that hurt badly. I used to retaliate ten times
for one hurt. But God says vengeance is mine, I will
repay.
As I forgave and
just simply counted the offense as worthless, a
wholesome, clean feeling came to me. I liked it.
I made a list of
things God allows me to think on and put it behind the
cabinet door in the kitchen. When I got off track, I'd
read the list. If what I was thinking about wasn't on
the list, I'd stop those thoughts, reject and throw
them out.
Continue To Break
Old Habits And Obey God - If lazy - Prov. 6:6, &
9; 10:26; 13:4; 20:4; 26:16. If disobedient - I Sam.
15:23; Ez. 20:38; Is. 30:1. If lying - Prov. 6:17;
Rev. 21:8. Whatever your problem, find the
instructions for the solution in the Bible and follow
them. If you fail, get up and try again: II Cor.
4:7-9, Book of James,
I Cor. 10, etc.
RESULTS
God has shown me that we would still be "us
four and no more family" except for Byron's death. We
avoided people with problems. We had always taken care
of our problems as they arose. We had everything:
positions, houses, cars, boats, etc. - what this world
says is success. We were wretched and poor in God's
eyes. Now each time God uses us to help someone, I see
it as a result of God's help, our obedience to God,
and Byron's death. Much good has come out of Byron's
death for many families, children and individuals.
Without deliverance from demon bondage, we'd probably
all be dead now.
LET'S GET STARTED
Repent
The first thing we need to do is repent for
being ignorant of the Bible which contains God's
advice and for not following that which we do know;
for wanting to or for living in fantasy; for blaming
others when it's your problem too; for not trusting
God and going on but living in the past; for the
unkindness you have done to others; for not believing
that this terrible thing that has happened can work
together for good and be useful to you, others and
God's plan; for not
accepting God's right to use you seeing you were
bought with a great and precious price; for not being
willing to be hurt as others are; for refusing to be
grateful to God in all things; for listening to and
following the advice of demons; for failing to
consider the others who have also been grieved by this
thing which has happened; for holding resentments
against yourself, others and God; and for allowing my
grief to become excessive.
Forgive
Ask God to remind you of all those against
whom you hold unforgiveness. Forgive all
yourself - everyone. Forgive those causing your grief.
Break Curses
Rebellion, divorce, death, occult
involvement, inherited curses, domination and
bitterness.
Pray any other
prayer that will establish the basis for deliverance
from grief and bitterness.
Ask God to give you
wisdom in correcting your thought patterns, ways of
treating others, purpose of your life, the things that
have hurt you so much; to help you understand how the
other members of you family have suffered; to help you
let Him use this thing for your good, the good of
others and God's plan.
LIST OF DEMONS TO CAST OUT IN THE
NAME OF JESUS